I Love Loli
by I.B.Fine
Summary: All the ways that Fudge shows his love for his Loli. A collection for the 5 Drabble Competiton Round 3 on the HPFC. Now complete.
1. Object: Gloves

"Next major milestone, you have to do better than a muggle concert. Honestly, this night has been a disappointment." Dolores Umbridge stated matter of factly.

"I understand, I will do better next time. I promise you Loli," Fudge pleaded apologetically.

"I'm holding you to that, hot buns."

"But, maybe this anniversary gift will change your mind… my sweet Loli."

Dolores looked skeptically at the slender pink box with a red bow keeping it tied shut together. With a shifty look towards her lover, she unravelled the bow and hastily took the top off the box. Within the box was a set of gloves.

"These gloves are specially handmade with the flesh of Hermione Granger, my dear Lolipop. Happy Anniversary."


	2. Color: Salmon

Dolores was finally going to Fudge's townhouse for the first time after she deemed his hovel unliveable for her female sensibilities.

"Do you like the new curtains, my dear Loli?" Fudge inquired.

"I do, but I feel like I would like it much in this way," Dolores said with a devious smirk as she ripped the salmon curtains from the rack.

Then, she pushed her lover on the bed and started to tie him down starting clockwise from his right forearm.

He was such a lovely sight, struggling against his salmon pink binds. He was so considerate to pick her favourite colour to redecorate his domicile.

It was a shame that she ruined the brand new salmon curtains however that is what the spell Reparo was for. Nothing was going to get in the way of her rewarding her man.


	3. Action: reading

It was a long day. Fudge was sitting in a plush armchair Dolores had brought to his townhouse that never left. In his hands was a tome that he had been reading for the past hour, leaving his precious Loli to her own devices.

Stroking her pastel kittens got old quick and Dolores was beyond bored. So she did what did best; pestering other people. Tonight, Fudge was her victim.

Armed with an endless supply of sugar quills, Dolores began to demand her man's attention. She started with a caress along his neck before shifting down to his armpits. Then, he started to chuckle and relax his hand from his book. His reading was done for tonight.

Because Dolores drifted her quill down south. This type of tickling needed to be completed in the bedroom.


	4. Event: Surprise Party

Fudge had spent weeks trying to prepare for his precious Loli's surprise party. Everything had to be just perfect. He had invested in all sixty-nine shades of pink and had the cutest kitty wrapped in a bow. His piece of resistance was on the centre of the table covered in a silver set of dining ware.

Dolores finally appeared from a long day at work. She thought her hot buns forgot her birthday like a typical man. Like a typical woman, she noticed the shininess of the silver and asked "What's in there?"

Fudge took his time opening the lid to the silver platter and then placed it down on the table.

On a silver platter was the head of Bane the centaur. His head was severed from his body in this worst way, blood was pooling on the platter and matting up his beard as it dried.

"It's fresh," Fudge said lyrically while waving the heavy bloody scythe that had previously been lying on the floor.


	5. A song by Jack White

**Flashback**

 **(Song) - "Love Interruption" by Jack White**

Today was their anniversary. Fudge had the brilliant idea of taking his precious Loli to a muggle concert with backstage passes. She couldn't stand wizarding music, but he knew she would like Muggle music. It was so darn catchy.

When they were backstage they heard someone singing " _I won't let love disrupt, corrupt, or interrupt me anymore_ " and barged through that door.

Dolores was delirious; she was looking right at that traitor Severus Snape and started on a rant that broke the Statute and ended in a Crucio.

"I'm an American! I have no stupid accent and don't know what a Snape or muggle is," the captured musician Jack White stated.

"It's not Snape, my dear Loli, he doesn't have that absurd nose." Fudge inspected the muggle singer.

However, in the ruckus they had created, Loli and hot buns were thrown out the concert building.


End file.
